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  • Here are some classic cliched Hindi film dialogues...
  • Heroine: Mein tumhaare bachche ki maa banane waalee hun!
  • (I'm going to become your kid's mother)
  • Hero: Kya!? (With a I'm-in-deep-shit-now look)
  • (What?!)
  • Hero's Mother/Father: Yeh lo pachchaas hazaar rupaih aur mere bete ko bhool
  • jao.
  • (Here, take these fifty thousand ruppees and leave our
  • son alone.)
  • Heroine's Father/Mother: Kullachchini, maine tujhe issi liye paal-pos ke
  • badaa kiya thaa ke tu mujhe yeh din dekhaaye?!
  • (Woman-from-a-lousy-family-tree, did I raise you to
  • show me this day?)
  • Villian's Hechman: Boss, Rita (the heroine) bhaag gayee...
  • (Boss, Rita's escaped.)
  • Villian: Jaao uska peecha karo!
  • (Go! Follow her!)
  • Gabbar Singh's Twist: Jaao unkaa peechaa karo, aur khaalee haath mut
  • anaa haramzaadon!!
  • (From SHOLAY) (Follow them, and don't come back empty-handed,
  • you bastards.)
  • ----------
  • Asjeet "Did I sprinkle some more culture, or what!" Lamba
  • Here are some more cliched dialogues:
  • -----------------
  • Heroine to Villian: Kutte, kameene; chhod de mujhe!!
  • (Dog; Meanie; leave me!)
  • Villian: *Grunt*
  • (Enter) Hero: Haraamzaade, main tera khoon pee jaaungaa!!
  • (Bastard, I'll drink your blood!)
  • -----------------
  • Hero to Mom (first meeting with heroine): Dekho ma main kisse laya hoon!
  • (Look who I've got to meet you mom!
  • Hero's mom: Aao betee, mere paas baitho...
  • (Come daughter, sit beside me...)
  • (If that happens to be Lalita Pawaar then we're treated to her awesome
  • natural wink, if you get what I mean @;)
  • Heroine: **BLUSH** **BLUSH** *Quickly pulls ghungat (veil) over her head
  • and touches her feet (the ma-in-law's feet that is!)*
  • -----------------
  • Old man: Bees saal pehle ki baat hai...
  • (This happened twenty years ago...)
  • *Fade to flashback...*
  • -----------------
  • >Who is this guy "Ajit"? Sounds like a gem. Can someone provide a few
  • >names of his movies? I'd like to rent a couple of his "classics" and
  • >hear some of this sparkling dialogue first-hand.
  • > ---san
  • Ajit: Raabart yeh hamaaree pictaron ke naam pooch rahaa hai. Isse liqueed
  • oxy-gin mein phaik do!
  • Chamcha 1: Lekin boss, agar macbeth ka zahar pilaayen to kaisa rahega.
  • K N Singh: Bevaakoof! Sharam nahi aati Ajit ki pictaron ke naam
  • poochte hoe!
  • Amjad "Gabbar" Khan: Arre O Sambha, kitnee pictaren banaaee hai
  • eeka Ajit ne jarra bataeeo to?
  • Sambha: Pooree pachchaas hajjar!
  • Amjad: Dhikkaar Hai!! Itnee pictarr banaee aur isne EK bhi nahi
  • dekhee!! Iski saja milegee. Baraubar milegee!
  • Raaj Kumar: Jaani, hum tumhe aisa nahi karne denge...
  • Amitabh Bachchan: Nazar utha ke dekh Gabbar. Tere sar pe maut mandalaa
  • rahee hai!
  • Chamcha 2: Arre yeh to Rekha hia!
  • Rekha: Hai mujhe maut kehte ho, Lamboo-jee...
  • Shamim: Arre miya maine to sirf uskee pictaron ke naam pooche the'...
  • -------------
  • BTW, just ask your local video guy for masaala movies with any
  • major star (of the 70's and early 80's) and you're almost sure
  • to find Ajit in it!!
  • --------
  • Asjeet "Yeh kya Raabart Raabart lagga rakhkhee hai" Lamba
  • ========
  • On similar lines:
  • Low life goondaa "eve-teasing" the heroine is accosted by a mean-
  • looking crowd.
  • Man 1: Tumhaare ghar mein kyaa maa, behen nahi hai?
  • (Don't you have a mom or sister at home?)
  • Ranjeet's rejoinder: Maa, behen to hai; lekin biwi nahi hai!
  • (Yeh, yeh. I have amom and sister, but no wife!)
  • Audience Member: Abbe maaro saale ko!!
  • (O you, beat-up the brother-in-law!!)
  • -------
  • At the grave risk of antagonizing some of my fellow netters,
  • I am taking the liberty of posting some classic (IMHO) commercials.
  • I believe these are STILL in circulation after so many years. I
  • hope this "funny stuff" doesn't antagonize too many people and
  • I profusely apologize to them and everyone else concerned with
  • computer-resources wastage. I promise to take a self-imposed
  • bun-waas provided I can find wheat-germ ones.
  • Bobby Saabun (Soap)
  • ------------
  • ....after discussing the attributes of the soap....
  • Woman: Pur ae duss shaa; bobby saabun da ke paah?
  • (But tell me this my man; how much does bobby soap cost?)
  • Man: Sun mereeye billow; bobby dus rupeeyeh killo!
  • (Listen my pussycat; bobby is ten ruppees a kilo!)
  • -------
  • Shikakaayee Kesh Tel (" Hair Oil)
  • --------------------
  • Woman 1: Bharjaaee-jee Mubaarkan!
  • (O my Brother's wife; Congrats!)
  • Woman 2: Kaa diyaan?
  • (For what?)
  • Woman 1: Ae baalaan te kedha mantar phereaa je; kinne kaale te
  • lumbey ho gaye ne!
  • (What spell have you cast on your hair. They are so black
  • and long!)
  • Woman 2: Ae kamaal shikakaayee kesh tel da ae!
  • (This awesome achievement is all due shikakaayee hair oil!)
  • Nirma Washing Powder
  • --------------------
  • Woman: Nirma! Washing powder Nirma. Dood see safedee Nirma se Aaye.
  • Rangeen kapdon mein khil khil jaaye. Sub ki pasand Nirma!
  • Washing powder Nirma, washing powder Nirma. NIRMA!!
  • (Aurat: Nirma! Dhone ka saabun Nirma. White as milk from Nirma.
  • Colorful clothes blossom blossom. Everyone's choice Nirma!
  • Dhone ka saabun Nirma, blah blah Nirma. NIRMA!)
  • (Boy in audience: Aha, meethee meethee.)
  • (Yeah, tastes sweet.)
  • Vicco Vujradunti Ayurvadic Cream
  • --------------------------------
  • Woman: Badde naazon se paalee hamaaree banno. Tujhe dulhan banaye
  • (sings) re pyaaree banno. Tujhe haldi ka something-or-the-other lagaayen
  • sakheeaan. Teri kaya ko komal banaye sakheeaan. Teri sakheeaan
  • are getting carried away singing and dancing...
  • (Aurat: My daughter, I have raised you with immense care and at great
  • personal sacrifices to me. I have kept you away from all those
  • sleaze-bag boyfriends of yours. So let your pals take this
  • opportunity to put a lot of gooey stuff on your arms, legs and
  • face (since we can't show anything else on Doordarshan (TV)).)
  • (Boy in audience: Aha, meethee meethee.)
  • (Yeah, tastes sweet.)
  • O. K. Saabun (Soap)
  • -------------------
  • Scene 1: Two men cycling together and discussing world affairs....
  • Man 1: Arre yeh toe bahut bada hai! Zaroor mehnga hoga!
  • (Hey, this toe is really big @:) (Should be kinda expensive)
  • Man 2: Nahi yaar! Bilkul mehenga nahi hai. Naha ke toe dekh!!
  • (No friend. No way!! It aint expensive. Bathe your toe and see @:)
  • Scene 2: Man 2 in the shower with a gulaabee (pink) OK soap in his hand...
  • Background Music and Voice: Joe OK say nahae kamal sa khil jaaye. OK
  • nahaane ka badaa saabun.
  • (If Joe bathes with OK soap, he'll blossom
  • like no ones business. OK is the BIG
  • bathing soap.)
  • Voiceover: Company's-name-deleted Utpaadan (Product).
  • (Boy in audience: Aha, meethee meethee.)
  • (Yeah, tastes sweet.)
  • (Boy's Mom: Chup, nahi toe haddi-passlee ek kar doongee....)
  • (Quiet, otherwise I'll fuse your bones and flesh....)
  • --------------------------
  • The Dating Scene:
  • ----------------
  • This is more an observation than anything else and it happened
  • at Odeon Cinema, Delhi. A girl walked in just before the movie
  • was to start and sat in the row in front of us. For some reason
  • she kept looking at her feet! We soon found out why!
  • A few minutes after the lights dimmed, a guy entered and headed
  • for the seat next to this girl's seat. No "Hi", "Hello" or
  • "Namaste" or "Whathaveyou" was exchanged. The guy sat down,
  • grabbed (literally!) her hand, and they got engrossed in the
  • movie (yeah, sure).
  • Intermission! Without preamble, the guy got up and left
  • the hall. The girl suddenly found something facinating
  • about her feet and started staring at them. The algorithm
  • was repeated at the end of the show with the "couple" leaving
  • seperately.
  • Luckily (for them) the girl's mom and dad didn't show up or we could
  • have witnessed something like this:
  • Mom: Kalmoohi! Maine tujhe issi din dekhne ne liye paidaa kiya thaa!
  • Ke tu mere peeth peechey gulcharrey udhatee phirre!?
  • (Black face! Did I give birth to you to show me this day!
  • That behind my back you fly flower-shots around!?)
  • Girl: Ma! Main Martandya se pyaar kartee hun!
  • (Mother! I love Martandya)
  • Boy: Hum ek doosrey ko jee-jaan se chahatey hain...!
  • (We love one another with our heart-life)
  • Dad: Haraamzaadey! Teri itni himmat! Meri beti par dorey daalta
  • hai! Teri haesiyat he kya hai?
  • (Bastard! Your that many guts! You're putting ropes around
  • my daughter! What is your social standing after all?)
  • Raaj Kumar: Arre jaani, jaane bhi do. Do pyaar bharey
  • dil hain. Gulcharrey nahi udhaengey to kya
  • world affairs discuss karengey kya?
  • (Oh lively one, let it be. Two love filled
  • hearts these are. If they don't fly
  • flower-shots what do you expect them to
  • do -- discuss world affairs?)
  • -----------
  • Remember some classic lines from Hindi Movies like the oldie below..
  • Ajit (pointing to the hero) : Ise liquid oxygen mein phenk do..liquid ise
  • jeene nahin dega aur oxygen ise marne nahin dega..
  • ------------------------------------------------------------------------
  • Well, most of the lines I know involve Ajit ( and I
  • strongly suspect that some of them are just made up
  • but they are funny anyway) - You just have to imagine
  • Ajit saying them in his characteristic drawl, with a
  • smirk on his face and a few henchmen in the background !
  • Ajit to a lady ( try shashikala here if you can't think
  • of any other vamp !) : 'Rosy let's be cozy ' !
  • Ajit to a lady : ' Lilly don't be silly '
  • --------------
  • Ajit to henchman and a lady ( yeah, yeah she's the same one!)
  • -- imagine the sound of water running in the bath in the
  • background -- :
  • 'Michael you take the cycle,
  • Mike, follow him on your bike,
  • Uh, oh - Mona tum nahati raho' !!
  • --------------
  • Ajit to henchman : 'Jack, is box me paanch lakh jaali note
  • hain, inko market me chala do '
  • (** this box contains fake currency notes, go and
  • circulate them in the market **)
  • --------------
  • Lady ( with half torn sari ) to Ajit ( with lust written all
  • over his face) :
  • lady : ' bhagwan ke liye mujhe chhor do'
  • Ajit : ' itni achi cheez to main bhagwan ke liye bhi nahin
  • chhor sakta'
  • (** For God's sake leave me
  • ** I can't leave such a nice thing, not even for God)
  • --------------
  • Henchman (panting and sweating) to Ajit : ' Boss, Boss sona
  • kahan hai ' ?
  • Ajit : ' Itna Bada maidan para hai, kahin bhi so jao '
  • (** where is the sona (gold)
  • ** This is such a big park, sleep (so) anywhere )
  • --------------
  • I read this one in Indian Today sometime back :
  • Ajit : 'Ise Hamlet poison de do, to be se not to be ho
  • jaayega '
  • (** Give him Hamlet poison, he will become 'not to be'
  • from 'to be' !!)
  • --------------
  • Rajkumar (talking very sarcastically about Amitabh Bachchan) :
  • ' Jaani, yeh wohi shaks hain na jinki taange unki gardan
  • se shuri hoti hain'
  • (** Isn't this the same guy whoose legs start from aroung
  • the region of his neck )
  • --------------
  • Rajkumar to Rahman in 'WAQT' (breaking a glass in the process) :
  • 'Chunoy seth, jinke ghar sheeshay ke bane ho, woh doosro par
  • pathar nahin pheka karte ' !!!
  • (- cut - the sound of whistles and clapping by the front benchers !)
  • (** Those who live in glass houses shouldn't........)
  • --------------
  • Rajkumar to Rahman's henchman ( Madan Puri - who is waving a
  • knife in Rajkumar's face) : 'Jaani, yeh bachhon ke khelne ki
  • cheez nahin' (taking the knife and folding it ) 'haath cut jai
  • to khoon nikal aata hai'
  • (- cut - the sound of whistles and clapping by the front benchers !)
  • (** A knife is not a toy for kids to play with, if it cuts
  • your hand, blood will come out )
  • -----------------------------
  • Here is some more of Ajit stuff!
  • Ajit: "...Kal aadhi raat ko theek 12 baje, hamara 'maal' Warsova ke
  • raste, Bambayee aayega....Michael, tum cycle par jao...Tony, tum pony
  • par jao....uh! oh! Mona darling?..tum nahati raho!....Michael, yeh lo
  • 100 ka aadha phata hua note...theek 12 baje Raka ke aadmi apni boat se
  • flash light ka signal denge...aan...aaff...aan...aaff...aan...aaff.
  • Michael, tum apni torch se unhe signal doge....boat kinare lagne par
  • tumhara code word hoga ``Din mein sitare hein, ham tumhare
  • hein''....baki log tabtak cabin ke peechhe ki jhadiyon mein rahenge..."
  • One henchman: "...par! par! Baass! woh to khujali wali jhadiayan hein!!..."
  • Ajit (with a broad wry smile): "...Smaaart baaye!!! Tony, yeh lo
  • Nixoderm ke tikiya!...aadhe log sona batorenge, aur adhe nixoderm
  • lagayenge!..."
  • ---------------------
  • Utpal Dutt: Jaisa ke Kalidas ne kaha hai, What's in the name?
  • Some other actor: Uncle Kalidas ne nahin, Shakespere ne!
  • (Uncle, Not kalidas, It was Shakespere )
  • Utpal Dutt: Are(y) bhai, jub naam mein hee kuchh nahin rakha,
  • to Shakespere ho ya Kalidas, Kya farak parta hai!
  • (** When there is nothing in the name, it doesn't matter
  • if it was Shakespere OR Kalidas **)
  • ---------------------
  • Ajit: " .....Raka ke aadmi apni boat se torch light ka signal denge..
  • aan..aaff...aan...aaff...aan...aaff. Michael, tum apni torch se
  • aaff..aan...aaff..aan..aaff..aan...karoge" (and so forth)
  • (Direct translation: Ajit: "....Raka's man will give a torch light signal
  • from his boat...on...off...on...off...on...off. and Michael, you with your
  • torch should go..off...on...off...on...off...on....")
  • ----------------------
  • Here is one more that I heard from someone:
  • Ajit: (to the ever present baldy 'yes baass' type sidey, having determined
  • Hero's fate)
  • "Ise Varnish me daal dho, Finish acchi hogi"
  • (Trans: "Throw him in Varnish; the 'finish' will be good")
  • -----------------------
  • BACKGROUND: Young woman, the object of Utpal Dutt's lascivious
  • attentions, is deeply scandalised.
  • YW: "Shar'm nahi aati, baaal sa'phed ho gaye hain phir bhi mere peechha
  • kar rahe hain" (or words to that effect)
  • [Aren't you ashamed of yourself molesting me at your age, with
  • your hair having turned white!?]
  • -------------
  • How about this classics scene:
  • The Hero has just married a very poor girl ( who later turns out to be
  • his father's friend's long lost daughter ) and has brought her home to
  • introduce to his parents.
  • Hero: Mala (for lack of a better name), Pitaji ke paon chuo.
  • ( Mala, touch father's feet)
  • Mala is bending down to touch the father's feet. Suddenly, THE FATHER
  • MOVES BACK TWO STEPS.
  • Father: Tum is khandan ki bahu kabhi nahi ban sakti.
  • ( You can never become the daughter-in-law of this house).
  • Father to Hero: Kamine, tune hamari ijjat ko mitti me mila diya.
  • Nikalja is ghar se. Aaj se tu mera beta nahin aur me tera baap nahin.
  • Samajh le ki tera baap mar gaya.
  • ( You have mixed my honour in the mud. Get out of the house. From today,
  • you are not my son and neither am I your father. Assume that your father
  • is dead.)
  • ---------
  • standard plot:
  • A poor man ekes out his living , providing for his wife and
  • three sons. A happy family . Here comes the villian,
  • frames (kills) the poor man, rapes (blinds) the wife and
  • puts the sons in three different parts of the city.
  • Bees Saal baad-
  • The sons grow up , typically under different religions,
  • meeet/fight each other. One of them romances the rich
  • villian's good(Yummy!) daughter, the second helps his own
  • father, the third helps his mother ,they all help the chawl, society
  • or whereever they live, ...songs, dance,..and so on and so forth.
  • Then suddenly they realize thru a family song (Yaadon ki Bhaarat)
  • or thru some family mark or letter (AAA) that they are one
  • family. The villian also realizes this and starts his pranks.
  • And then they all go and do dishooom.@@**..bang.bang! Dishoom..##%^
  • the villian is defeated/killed, the police come(last but one scene),
  • arrest the goondas.....
  • The poor man meets his wife, the sons meet their
  • father/mother, the father/mother meet their honewali (ya ho gayee)
  • bahu/bahuen..... and they all live happily ever after.
  • ---------
  • I don't remember where this came from, but i really like it. Here is how it
  • goes:
  • The villain has the heroine tied to an electric chair with a long electric
  • wire leading to a switch. The villain throws the switch and the electricity
  • is now shown flowing towards the heroin. The hero is running towards the
  • heroine racing with electricity to save her, and yes he is catching up.
  • The villain at this point shouts to his chamcha: "Charlie voltage baddhao,
  • electicity jaldee jayegi".
  • ----------
  • How about this one in "hero hiralal?"
  • Rabert, Ise thadpa-thadpa kar zinda rakho!
  • ---------
  • The villain has just asked his guys to get hold of Mudassar Nazar, who
  • has refused to come to the villain's den.
  • Sidie: Boss, Mudassar Nazar nahin aa raha hai.
  • Villain: Kya? Tumhare ankhe hai ya button? Phir se dhoondo!
  • ---------
  • Ajit is on the phone to Seth Dharam Prashad, played by that
  • insufferable dude, AK Hangal (who, just as an aside, needs to
  • be eliminated along with Nirupa Roy): (translations provided).
  • Ajit: Seth Dharam Prashad, aapki beti hamare kabze mein hai!
  • [Seth Dharam Prashad, your daughter is in my nefarious hands!]
  • Seth: Hullo, hullo, kaun bol raha hai?
  • [Hullo, hullo, who is this?]
  • Ajit: Pyaar se log mujhe tayllipphone kehte hain!
  • [People affectionately call me tayllipphone!]
  • (Damn, it loses a certain charm in the translation.)
  • ---------
  • Hero/Heroine or one of their relatives has lost his/her memory
  • after an accident typically on being swept away in a river or
  • after having been hit by a car.The victim is slowly regaining
  • consciousness (cleverly depicted by the screen gradually turning from hazy
  • to clear) and utters in a totally lost tone
  • "Main kahaan hoon?"(Where am I?)
  • ------
  • Ravi : Jitendra
  • Maa : Nirupa Roy
  • Foto : Om prakash
  • Ravi: Maa, Tumhaare aasheervaad se main aaj B.A. FIRST class mein
  • pass ho gaya hoon.
  • [ Mom, your cool_dude son graduated today ]
  • [ Guess what ?! In first class ]
  • Maa : Bahuth khushee ki baath hai beta.
  • Le, yeh parshaad kha le.
  • [ Son, that's really impressive ]
  • [ Thulp this parshaad ]
  • [Roy goes to the Foto of Om prakash, that is hanging on the wall]
  • Dekho ji.
  • Aaj apke beta ne aap ki baath nibhaya hai.
  • [ Look hubby, your son the cool dude, what a shot !]
  • [ Roy to her son ]
  • Beta ...
  • Ek achchi si naukari doond le
  • Aur,
  • Jaldi se ek Bahuraani bhi le aaa
  • [ Son, how about cashing a job and
  • closing on a female ? ]
  • Ravi: Maa ... uummnn ...
  • Bahu rani tho my dhoond hee liya hai.
  • [ Geez, closed on a girl already ]
  • Maa : SSsaachchc ?^#!@*&!
  • Kaun hai beta vo khush kismat valee ?
  • [ Really !, who's that babe ? ]
  • Ravi: Seth Gangaram ki beti, Asha.
  • [ ddaannn ...dddaaann .... music in the background
  • and a face full of *%$*( of Nirupa Roy in the foreground ]
  • ------
  • And the saga continues...
  • Maa: BETAA!!! Yeh mujhse tu kis janam ka badla le raha hai!?
  • (Sonny, whatcha screwing up my happiness for?)
  • Ravi: MAA, tu kyaa keh rahee hai?
  • (Duh?!?!)
  • Maa: Beta, yeh wohi Seth Gangaram hai jisne tere pitaajee kaa
  • khoon karvayaa thaa! (BACKGROUND musicians go CRAZY!)
  • (You little twerp, this was the same jerk who knocked up
  • (errr...off) your daddy-jee)
  • Ravi: Kya!?
  • Member of Audience: Abbe saale, sunaaee nahi deta tereko!?
  • (Oh, brother-in-law, can't you hear?)
  • Ravi: Maa, yeh tu kyaa keh rahi hai?
  • (Writer's Interjection: Our Hero is not exactly PhD material.)
  • Maa: Beta, bees saal pehle ke baat hai...
  • (Son, this happened 20 years ago...)
  • Ravi: Yeh, yeh mom get on with it. I've heard that before...
  • (Haan, haan maa aur kuch bolo. Yeh maine sab suna hua hai...)
  • Maa: (STARTS SOBBING HYSTERICALLY) Beta, beta yeh tu kya keh raha hai...
  • Audience Member 2: Arre yaar yeh to phir rone lagee!!!
  • (Geez man this woman started all over again)
  • Other Members: MAARO MAARO ISSE!!!
  • (Kill her, Kill her)
  • SO we Finally get rid of Ms. Roy. Thanks once again to the mob
  • mentality. Who said mob mentality was all bad!!
  • ---------
  • Asjeet "dialogue-wallah. Achche achche dialogue-wallah" Lamba
  • ---------
  • The scene: Pran is looking through a telescope at a safe from afar. He turns
  • to his henchman and says (in the famous Pran style):
  • "Woh safe Johnson and Johnson ka hai. Iss duniya mai siraf teen log usko
  • khol sakte hai."
  • "Kaun hai, boss. Kaun?"
  • And Pran replies (after an appropriate pause):
  • "Johnson, Johnson aur mai."
  • -------
  • Talkin' 'bout insufferable characters and inevitable lines,
  • what about those snotty kids ?
  • Kiddo (in [aargh!] irritating whine+wail) : "Maaa, mujhe bhookh
  • lag rahi hai. Mujhe khane ke liye kuchh do, na!"
  • Mother (losing her fragile cool, slaps kid, then bursts into
  • tears, increasing the demand for glycerine in India by 1% ) :
  • "Chup raho! Kaha na ki kuchh nahin hai".
  • [ The "chup raho" sentiment is shared whole-heartedly by all and
  • sundry; Unfortunately, junior is bawling loudly. Afore-mentioned
  • sentiment becomes stronger than ever, now with deleted expletives
  • after the "chup". ]
  • Then Mommy relents, and hugs Munna to bosom, wiping his snotty
  • face with pallo of sari, while deep erosion of her facial make-up
  • occurs due to torrential downpour from the eyes above. Produces
  • a glass of milk. Junior gulps this down, and falls asleep.
  • Maa-ji (in conspiratorial whisper laden with sorrow to daughter
  • a.k.a. Hero's sister ) : "Munne ke doodh main mein aadha pani mila
  • hai." [Neglecting to mention the high glycerine content!]
  • -----------------------------------------------------------------
  • (situation: Ajit in his den, with henchmen hanging around; some of them
  • gambling. Ajit fidgeting about somewhat.)
  • AJIT: Raabut, jaao Bhole ki beti ko uttha ke lao.
  • (Robert, go get (abduct) Bhole's daughter)
  • ROBERT: Par Boss, woh to goongi aur behri hai...?!
  • (But boss, she deaf and dumb is...?!)
  • AJIT: Ohohohohohohohooo! Bewakoof hum use geeta paatth karwane thodi laa rahe
  • hain!
  • (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Moron, we her religious_text_reading to do hardly
  • getting!)
  • ------
  • To quote the usual text from Hindi films: (IPC)
  • Inhe dafaa 302 tazirat-e-Hind saza-e-maut di jaati hai.
  • He is to be hung by the neck until he dies.
  • Tumhari koi aakhree ichchha hai ?
  • ------
  • This is almost true, but what the heck....
  • Ajit : Taany, is kutte ko potaasium khila do
  • Tony: Lekin, sarkar, potaasium se kya hoga ?
  • Ajit: Pot isse uuper le jayega, haash isse aur uuper le jayaega aur opium isse
  • khuda ke paas pahuncha dega.
  • -----
  • The scene is that ajit is worried about something.
  • Robert is facing him.
  • Ajit : Raabert about turn.
  • Ajit : Raabert about turn again. Humme tumshe baath karnee hain.
  • ------
  • Ajit is sitting in his garage thinking about a big maal comming from
  • Birmingham.
  • Mac : Baas headache ho raha hai.
  • Ajit : Head Aaek ho ya Do tumhe jaana he padega.
  • ------
  • Now a days cricket match is going on between India and West Indies.
  • Ajit is a great fan of the team.he is listening to the commentary.
  • A short scene in his den.
  • Ajit : Peter score kya hai
  • Peter : Baas aapne halath kharab hai.
  • Ajit : Kyoon Kya Hooaa.
  • Peter : bass Richards chhake mar raha hai.
  • Ajit : Rabbert usse phone lagaon.
  • Robert to Richard. : Richard hamara bass tumse baath karna chahta hain.
  • Ajit : Richard Lawin speaking.
  • Richard : Who Lawin.
  • Ajit : tumhara leye itn kaaphe hain.Soono Tum aabhi Kapil ke tesre gend
  • per Midaan per catch dekar aauut ho jayoge.
  • Richard : I cannot do this Wi will loose the match.
  • Ajit : Tumhe aisaa karna hi padega ' Tumahari Maa hamaare kabze me hain.
  • ------
  • Some good "phatta's" (PJ's) from Sanjiv Kumar in Manoranjan when he tries
  • to speak in Urdu:
  • "Hum Lukhnow ke nabaab hain. Nabaabe maamulee naheen, nabaabe mughlaai"
  • [I can't translate this and keep it funny].
  • "Begam pulaav ki sughand le rahee thee aur baavarchee begam ki" (Begam was
  • enjoying the fragrance of the delicious pulav, and the cook was enjoying
  • begam's fragrance).
  • Shammi Kapoor's name in the film is Dhoop Chhaao, and he justifies it
  • by saying, "tajurbein kee dhoop aur akla kee chaao" (heat of experience
  • and coolness of intelligence).
  • -------
  • This is an interesting piece from the film Holi
  • Two boys are eye-ing a cute little chic who is going by and the
  • conversation that issues is as follows
  • Boy : Tumharie Chappal bahut acchi hai !!
  • (Your sandals are very cute !)
  • Girl : Utaaroon Kyaa ?!!
  • (should I take them off ? (with the intention of hurling them
  • at the boy , of course !))
  • To which the boy retorts ....
  • Boy : Tumharie dress bhi bahut acchi Hai !
  • (Your dress is very cute too .... !)
  • -------
  • How about the following from the evergreen Prem Chopra
  • Mein woh bala hu jo sishe se pathar todta hoon.
  • ------
  • How about the movie : RANG BIRANGI
  • I happen remember just one Utpal Dutt dialogue off hand.
  • In the movie, Utpal Dutt starred as a police officer who did
  • not like Films...
  • Once on the telephone:
  • Utpal Dutt: Kya? School ki diwar par filmon ke poster....
  • ........... Sare ke sare phaad do!
  • [** What? Movie posters on the school walls.... TAIR THEM ALL**]
  • [After a pause......]
  • Kya? Poster itni achhi tareh chipke hain ke utaare
  • nahin jaa sakte.... ACHHA! TO DIWAR HEE GIRA DO!
  • [** What?... Posters are glued in a way that they
  • can not be removed? OK THEN BREAK THE WALL **]
  • ------
  • Here's one dialogue I have'nt seen on the net so far. From Des Pardes:
  • Ajit is a "total" smuggler king. He is involved in smuggling illegal
  • aliens into england and then exploiting them by blackmail. (No, he
  • does'nt sponsor them :-). It is early morning, and Ajit & Co. are bringing
  • in a new boatload of slaves. One brash young dude comes out from the
  • hold of the ship (dark and dingy one, I'll bet) up to the bridge where
  • Ajit is supervising the operation.
  • Illegal: "Sahab, abhi to suraj bhi nahin nikla"
  • (Sir, it's too early --- look, the sun has'nt risen yet)
  • Ajit: "Yeh vilayat hai, yahan pe suraj der se nikalta hai"
  • (This is England, the sun rises late here)
  • The alien, flummoxed by Ajit's intellect, cowers and returns to
  • the (dark and dingy) hold. Ajit smiles, the situation under control.
  • In the same movie:
  • Tina Munim is a young lass "imported" by Ajit through his agent
  • Prem Chopra. Tina eventually teams up with the hero Dev Anand, and
  • pretends to be dumb. Prem Chopra is apologetic as he presents Tina
  • Munim to his 'Baas' :
  • Prem: "Lekin, baass, yeh to ...... Gungi hai!"
  • (Boss, but she is dumb .... )
  • Ajit: "To kya hua, maine kaun sa es-se Gita ka path karvana hai!"
  • (So what, as if I need her to recite from the Geeta!)
  • --------------
  • How about this one from Zanjeer?
  • The hero has just landed in Ajit's (big) 'bungla' to remind him of
  • what happened 20 years ago. And Ajit goes,
  • "Aao Vijay, Baito aur hamaare saath ek iscotch piyo. Hum
  • tumhe kha todi jaayenge. Vaise bhi hum vegetarian hain!!"
  • (Hi Vijay, why don't you have a drink with me. I am not going
  • to eat you. Moreover, I am a vegetarian!!)
  • -------
  • More funny episodes:
  • Actors : Paintal
  • Keshto Mukherjee
  • Paintal is chasing Keshto Mukherjee and the chase leads both of them
  • to a hospital.
  • Keshto keeps going in circles in and out of different corridors and
  • finally sees an empty stretcher lying around. Keshto lies down on
  • the stretcher and covers himself up with the plain white bedsheet.
  • Paintal comes panting and does not see Keshto anywhere around but
  • he does spot the stretcher and lifts the top of the bedsheet out
  • of curiosity.
  • The moment the bedsheet is uncovered, Keshto who is still
  • lying on the stretcher, says in a
  • hushed up voice: "Dead body, dead body".
  • Paintal immediately covers up Keshto again and runs away from there!!.
  • -------
  • Here's a classic Amitabh dialogue from Amar Akbar Anthony (the translation is
  • pathetic and doesn't bring out the right mood):
  • Scene: After Amitabh gets beaten up by Zibisko at the end of the 'My name is
  • Anthony Gonzalves' song (because he gets drunk and loses his coordination),
  • he confronts himself in the mirror (still drunk)
  • Basss, ho gaya pitayi?! Khush, khush?
  • [Now that you have been beaten up, are you happy?]
  • Tere ko main iska vasteyich bolta tha ki daru mat pi, mat pi, mat pi daru, ka...
  • .....kharab chiz hai.
  • [Didn't I warn you never to get drunk? Liquor is bad stuff.]
  • Tu agar daru nahin piyela hota, to kya woh jadya tere ko marne ko sakta?
  • Bol, kya tere ko marane ko sakata?
  • [If you had not been drunk, could that fatso have beaten you?]
  • Are Anthony bhai, tum akela das, das aadmi ko marane ko sakata.
  • [Mr. Anthony, you can single-handedly fight ten guys.]
  • Par tu apunka suntayich kidhar hai!! Kidharyich sunta hai?
  • [But you never listen to me. Do you?]
  • Dek dek thopda dekh.
  • Dek thopda aayine main jake dekh, kitna mara tereko.
  • [Go see your face in the mirror; find out how badly he beat you up]
  • Pakka idiot dikhta hai!
  • {Does this need any translation?}
  • Abhi tum hilne ka nahin, apun davai lagaye ga.
  • [Now be steady, I'll apply some ointment]
  • Are baba, hilta kai ko hai? Steay, steady, steady, .......
  • [Why the hell are you moving?]
  • -------
  • Another classic Amitbah dialogue from the same film:
  • Scene: Jeevan is running away from the cops carrying gold biscuits. Our hero
  • stumbles him and J. falls down
  • "Aadmi life mein doich time aisa bhagta hai,
  • olympic ka race ho ya police ka case ho"
  • [A person runs twice like this in his life: if there is an Olympic race or if
there is a police case]

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